If you know me, you know I LOVE the transformation industry. I love that we support our clients to grow into who they really are. I love that we hold space for our clients to reach their goals. I love that we navigate journeys for our clients to learn and evolve.
But if you know me, you also know that there are some things about the transformational industry that I don’t love…some things that I feel are out of integrity…some practices that don’t always impact folks in the most positive of ways.
One of these things, and we’ve discussed in this newsletter before, is toxic positivity.
Well, in 2022 I’ve been seeing an outgrowth of toxic positivity – the charge all over social media to “live your best life this year.” Well, for some of us, that’s a worthy endeavor for 2022. And if you are able to live your best life this year – YES! That is amazing!!!!
And…for some of us, 2022 is simply just not the year to live your best life. The world is still reeling from the events of the last two+ years. There has been a lot of chaos. There has been personal and collective trauma. There has been a lot of change. There may be some languishing going on. For some of us, our kids need extra help right now. For some of us, our parents or friends need extra help right now. For some of us, things are feeling a bit hard.
If you’ve been impacted by any of this, and you are not feeling up to living your best year yet…I hereby give you permission not to!
Not every year is meant to be your best year yet. There are different seasons in life that have different experiences and lessons in store for us. That’s not a negative way of looking at life. That’s not not being hopeful. That’s just understanding what it means to be human.
Sometimes the transformation industry forgets that we are human….forgets that it can’t always be chocolate and rainbows and unicorns. Forgets that it’s not always supposed to be bigger and better.
And when we forget that we are human, we cease to have self-compassion. We are working so hard to achieve a goal or a perfection that is simply unachievable in that moment, and then we end up feeling ashamed or self-judgmental or disappointed that we couldn’t achieve the impossible.
It’s so valuable to really understand this for ourselves, and it’s also so valuable to really hold this for our clients.
That’s not to say we can’t also help them vision big and work to reach their goals. Of course, of course, we can and should if that’s what’s right for our clients. But there are some seasons where what our clients need most from us is the space to grieve or the space to rage or the space to cultivate compassion for their need to move slower or not have clarity for a bit.
Let’s raise the bar on the transformation industry not by only helping our clients achieve bigger goals when it’s right, but by helping them learn to love and accept and embrace their humanity.